The Angels' outfield defense was supposed to be a many splendored thing. With Josh Hamilton supplanting Mark Trumbo in right field, Mike Trout shifting to left and Peter Bourjos returning to a starting role in center, the Halos had arguably the best defensive outfield in all of the land.

We even joked how the Halos could play just Trout and Bourjos and still have nary a ball drop in the outfield. Ha! Ha! Ha! LOLZ. /fart sounds

Intellectually, that all still makes sense. Mike Trout and, when healthy, Peter Bourjos have range on range on range. And that Josh Hamilton guy is no slouch either when playing in the corner rather than center where he just doesn't have the athleticism anymore. The problem is that our eyes thus far hath been deceived... or at least that is what the defensive metrics would have us believe. Just look at this table of how the Angels' preferred starting outfield grades out in the most popular advanced defensive metrics. SPOILER ALERT: Negative numbers are no bueno.

The May 22nd, 2013 edition of daily news for the Los Angeles Angels including Sean Burnett activated from the DL, the five stages of SciosciaFace and much more...

The Story: Sean Burnett was activated from the DL for last night's game with Ryan Brasier option to Triple-A.

The Monkey Says: The question is does Mike Scioscia actually remember how to use a reliever who he has actually heard of before and who is actually capable of getting people out? Inquiring minds want to know!

The Story: The Battle of Los Angeles and the Five Stages of SciosciaFace.

The Monkey Says: "Glutinous web." Congrats on having your breakfast ruined.

On the list of accomplishments that the multi-talented Mike Trout might someday complete, hitting for the cycle seemed inevitable. With his blend of speed and power, it was a question of if, not when. Well, the we just got the answer to the "when" as Trout just became the third youngest player ever to hit for the cycle as the Angels thrashed the Mariners.

So, I guess this means we get to fire up the Trout vs. Cabrera debate all over again, right? I'm kidding, obviously. Seriously, please don't do that. What you can do is realize that this is just another sign of how great Trout is. Sure, the cycle is wildly overrated and really more of a statistical anomaly than a feat indicative of greatness, but it still holds a special place in the hearts of baseball fans because of the variety of skills one must possess to achieve it. We already knew Trout possessed those skills, but I'll be damned if it wasn't fun to watch him put them on display like he did tonight.

Here is the homer that completed the cycle for him, for your viewing enjoyment:

All I know is that the fans sitting above the right center field wall where his cycle-clinching homer landed have to feel like real buffoons for letting the ball hit them right in the hands only to fall harmlessly to the center field track. That would've been one hell of a souvenir.

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The evening began with birthday boy Josh Hamilton launching a deep 2-run home run into left centerfield. The star of Arte Moreno's 2012 offseason looks like he is finally ready to climb out of his season-long funk. And that could very well have been the story of the night, but the 32-year-old's birthday bash was overshadowed by a kid 11 years his junior: Mike Trout, who made the Mariners pitching staff his personal punching bag.

The rising star is looking more and more like the absolute beast he was last season with each passing day, but tonight's game was special. Not only did the Kid match his career-high RBI total (5), he hit for the cycle, becoming the first Halo player to do it since Chone Figgins in 2006. It's hard to believe Mike Trout is only 21 years old. It's even harder to believe that he became the youngest player in American League history to ever hit for the cycle. 

Let's take a moment, in the midst of this here disappointing season, and really appreciate just how freakishly good Mike Trout is. We are watching a supreme talent, who is only getting better. Scary.

Angels 12, Mariners 0

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Game Notes

-- Jerome Williams is making an emphatic case for a permanent stay in the starting rotation. The right-hander dominated the hapless Mariners over eight shut out innings, featuring a nasty 2-seam fastball/sinker to induce tons of ground ball outs. Once Jered Weaver returns, Mike Scioscia and Jerry Dipoto may have to swallow their pride and send Joe Blanton to the bullpen. We'll see how that goes.

-- Any time Josh Hamilton is hitting balls hard the opposite way, you know he's going good. The home run he launched to left-center was crushed. Could we be seeing the beginnings of a hot streak?

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Halo Hero of the Game

Who's got two thumbs, was doused in a post-game ice bath by his teammates, and wins at everything? This guy!

As the baseball world focuses their hearts and minds on the greatness that is reigning AL MVP and Triple Crown adorned Miguel Cabrera, one cannot help but feel sorry for Mike Trout. Poor Mike Trout. Woe is Mike Trout. While Miggy is earning praise and adulation from every corner of the globe, Trout is mired in the sad state of being merely pretty good.

What is a jilted MVP candidate to do? How can he possible overcome this terrible, terrible sophomore slump that so many prognosticated?

I simply don't know. This plight is just so-

What?

He isn't?

You mean to say-

Are you sure?

No sophomore slump at all?

Not even a little?

Oh, well then. So much for the narrative.

Yes, sorry to break it to everyone, but MIke Trout's sophomore slump never really came to pass. Oh, sure, he kind of had a down week or two in April, but a brief slump is something every hitter goes through. Instead, it appears that Trout has been every bit the player he was last season and is showing signs that he might actually be better, which is a thing that was not really considered feasible. Just take a look at how his stats compare from season-to-season:

via Fangraphs

The May 21st, 2013 edition of daily news for the Los Angeles Angels including Albert Pujols doesn't matter anymore, rekindling the Cabrera-Trout debate and much more...

The Story: Albert Pujols doesn't matter anymore.

The Monkey Says: I cannot counter any of this. Pujols just isn't a top player anymore, at least not while his body is broken down the way it is right now. The problem is that there is little reasont to believe that his body won't continue to betray him given his age and the chronic nature of his current injuries. He can still be a very good player, but only in spurts and that may not hold true for much longer.

The Story: Jon Heyman rekindles the Miguel Cabrera-Mike Trout MVP and WAR debate.

The Monkey Says: I'm pretty sure Heyman only brought this up to let us know that players think he is somehow the arbiter of such things. This, and similar pieces that came out after Miggy's three-homer Sunday, all directly or indirectly use Cabrera's stellar start to 2013 as some kind of justification for the 2012 MVP voting even though 2013 has nothing to do with last season by the very definition of the MVP award voting. The most irritating part though is that Heyman once again claims that the ONLY evidence that Trout was better was WAR. Statheads did call out WAR a lot in that argument, but it was just one of the many pieces of evidence in Trout's favor. No one who knows stats well would declare that WAR is the end-all, be-all. It is just a handy benchmark, not proof of anything.

The Angels continue to teeter on the edge of irrelevancy but that won't stop us from ranking the players under the (misguided?) belief that they can snap out of this funk....

RANK	PLAYER	CHANGE	COMMENTS
1		-- 0 Last Week: 1	Mike Trout - Trout had another great week but the looking strikeouts, of which he had four this week, are really starting to make my blood boil.
2		+1 Last Week: 3	Howie Kendrick - Not only is he beating the crap out of the ball right now, he hasn't GIDP'd in 11 games and counting.
3		-1 Last Week: 2	Mark Trumbo - He only had six hits last week, but five of them were extra-base hits. We can live with that.
4		+3 Last Week: 7	Jason Vargas - Vargas is either going to be a big reason the Angels got back into the Wild Card race or he is going to be a nice trade chip at the deadline.
5		-- 0 Last Week: 5	C.J. Wilson - He finally went seven innings! Hallelujah!
6		-- 0 Last Week: 6	Albert Pujols - It used to be that a week of an .852 OPS was a mild disappointment for The Machine. Now it is a sign of hope.
7		+3 Last Week: 10	Alberto Callaspo - Has Alberto Callaspo ever hit a homer that wasn't of critical importance?
8		-4 Last Week: 4	Ernesto Frieri - Frieri seemed to go out of his way this week to make sure that Ryan Madson gets pushed into the closer job sooner rather than alter.
9		+7 Last Week: 16	Jerome Williams - Williams is giving the Angels everything they thought they were getting from Blanton and yet I still fear he will be moved back to the bullpen when Weaver comes back.
10		+1 Last Week: 11	Scott Downs - With as bad as the rest of the pen has been, what does Scioscia have to lose by letting Downs face a few righties?
11		-3 Last Week: 8	Erick Aybar - You have to love a leadoff man with a .263 OBP.
12		+5 Last Week: 17	Chris Iannetta - Iannetta drew seven walks in the last week. Josh Hamilton has ten walks all season.
13		+2 Last Week: 15	Josh Hamilton - A .304 batting average and .478 slugging last week for Hamilton? Is this real life?
14		-5 Last Week: 9	Dane De La Rosa - His arm still hasn't fallen off, but it sure seems like his effectiveness has taken a big hit.
15		+8 Last Week: 23	Robert Coello - From completely anonymous to pitching six innings in four appearances this week to arguably make him a vital part of the Angel bullpen. Yeah, that is totally normal and sustainable.
16		-4 Last Week: 12	Michael Kohn - The first rule of relief pitching is you don't walk Jeff Keppinger on four pitches with the bases loaded.
17		+5 Last Week: 22	J.B. Shuck  - Alright, I give in. Shuck ain't half bad with the bat. He's kind of a circus in the field sometimes though.
18		+1 Last Week: 19	Brendan Harris - Going into the season, I think we an all safely say that there was no scenario that anyone envisioned in which Brendan Harris would have to play both left field and first base.
19		-1 Last Week: 18	Hank Conger - Since his defensive debacle in Houston, Conger has only made two starts, both with Wilson on the mound. So much for the proclamation that he'd start stealing playing time from Iannetta.
20		-7 Last Week: 13	Garrett Richards - So what do the Angels do with Richards now? They shifted him back to the bullpen because they thought he'd be a weapon and now he kind of stinks in that role.
21		-7 Last Week: 14	Joe Blanton - Nine innings pitched this week and 23(!) hits allowed. If he keeps his rotation spot after Weaver comes back, then Scioscia really does need to be fired.
22		-- 0 Last Week: n/a	Michael Roth - Roth has a future in this league but for now he is the designated sacrificial lamb.
23		-2 Last Week: 21	Luis Jimenez - Well, it was fun while it lasted. See you in September, Lucho.
24		-4 Last Week: 20	Mark Lowe - With Madson and Burnett due back in the coming week or two, Lowe should probably start looking for apartments in Salt Lake.
25		-1 Last Week: 24	Barry Enright - Finally., someone who can make Joe Blanton look good by comparison.

Dropped from rankings: Scott Cousins (kicked to curb)

Biggest Riser: Coello, up eight spots

Biggest Dropper: Blanton and Richards, down seven spots each

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