The May 13th, 2013 edition of daily news for the Los Angeles Angels including Madson nearing a return, Umpires disciplined for pitching change fiasco and much more...

The Story: Ryan Madson will begin his rehab assignment at High-A Inland Empire today.

The Monkey Says: The speculation is that he will need one or two appearances before being activated. One can only assume that he'll be handled with kid gloves upon his activation, but at least our long national nightmare is coming to a close with Madson on track to finally join the Angels this week.

The Story: The crew chief for the umpires that allowed the illegal pitching change in the Astros-Angels game was suspended for two games.

The Monkey Says: The rest of the crew was fined. They offer no explanation for how the crew screwed this up, but at least they acknowledged that they did. What is really interesting is that the suspension was announced as it was previously believed that all umpire discipline measures were supposed to remain confidential. I guess MLB just couldn't do that in the face of such a fundamental rule being broken.

Well, so much for the Angels turning things around. Finally owning a three-game winning streak, the Halos ran into a buzzsaw. A buzzsaw with pipe cleaner arms and some pretty wicked stuff.

There really isn't any mystery here. Chris Sale was terrific, the Halos hitters were not. It is something we have seen all too often from a lineup that was supposed to be one of the best in the league. In fact, the only real mystery here is when the Angels are going to get no-hit. It just feels inevitable, even with all their supposed talent. The only reason it might not happen is because of Mike Trout and he, naturally, was the one who got the Angels' lone hit.

Losing was one thing, but losing like this really hurts as it has to kill a great deal of the already minimal momentum they just finished building. Such is the 2013 Angels.

Angels 3, White Sox 0

I'm sure that the mere fact Angel fans are celebrating three wins in a row on the road shoudl be an indicator about the state of affairs in and around this team. But tonight's win over the White Sox carries with it the air of a team righting the ship. The Angels are slowly starting to resemble the sqaud we all thought we were getting at the beginning of the season. The hitting is there, the defense is solid and the pitching is serviceable enough to get wins. I know its not much, but three wins in a row is still the best indicator that maybe this team isn't DOA.

Angels 3 White Sox 2

I have to admit that I only sort of paid attention to this game until late. This was due to three factors. 1) the Anaheim Ducks are in the Stanley Cup Playoffs and playoff hockey is awesome. 2) My children were wild banshees due to the fact that I was immersed in two sporting events and not the latest episode of PHINEAS and FERB. 3) The Angels have kind of sucked for the first month and week of the season so I was a bit disheartened when the emergency starter for tonight's game gave up a lead off home run. But I did slowly come around to the game the same way the Angels slowly wore down the Sox on their way to a win.

Angels 7 White Sox 5

With the season in full gear, it’s time to face facts. The Angels are hurting and no one can quite put their finger on a diagnosis. Any and all suggestions are being considered as the team looks for ways to hit their stride and begin making a climb in the AL West. Trades, minor league assignments, even coaching changes are all on the table. Every idea, no matter how radical, is being considered as the Halos look for the spark to start racking up some wins.

Here then, are five good reasons to replace Josh Hamilton with a turtle.

1) A Turtle will get on base more often than Josh Hamilton.

Pacific Leatherback Sea Turtles are the largest turtles in the world. At their largest, they’re barely above the knee of a human being. Given that a normal strike zone is said to be between the numbers and the knees, even the largest turtle in the world has basically has no strike zone. Bat the turtle second between a lead off Peter Bourjos or Erick Aybar and before Mike Trout and you’ll have two men on for Mikey to blast three run homers all season! Just make sure Trout does some extra pushups at practice. We’ll need him to pick up and carry his turtle teammate on his way around the bases. Angel fans have sat through Bengie Molina’s base running, but even that patience has its limits.

2) There is no wage scale for non humans in the MLB.

This one may be taking advantage a bit, but if it brings wins, we must consider it. Rookie contracts and veteran minimums are all but set in stone, but turtle wages? There’s nothing on the books! Which means a turtle can be signed for whatever number he’ll take on a contract. Being that turtles live in their shells, he wouldn’t have many financial needs. We may be able to sign him for nothing but some beach land to retire on, a truckload of turtle chow, and an occasional trip to the zoo to get some turtle groupies.

The May 10th, 2013 edition of daily news for the Los Angeles Angels including C.J. Wilson gets engaged to Brazilian supermodel, Dipoto dances around firing Scioscia questions and much more...

The Story: C.J. Wilson got engaged to his Bra-lisallzilian supermodel girlfriend earlier this week.

The Monkey Says: I think she should've said no until he pitched seven full innings in a start. Make him earn it.

The Story: Jerry Dipoto dances around making a direct statement about Scioscia's job security.

The Monkey Says: Jerry is quoted here with a lot of talk about "we" and said on Jim Bowden's radio show how they'd work out of the hole "together." That sounds like a tacit vote of confidence, but it is standard Dipoto speak where he makes it sound like he is saying yes but is also leaving himself enough wiggle room for the answer to still be no.

The story of this game should be how the Angels are barely clinging to life after sneaking out of Houston with a late-inning rally to avoid a sweep. But you and I know we can't focus on that, not after the shenanigans Bo Porter and the umpires pulled.

If you missed it, enjoy watching a MLB manager and umpiring crew take a dump over the very basic rule than any pitcher entering a game must face at least one batter before being replaced.

Thanks to the nearly empty stadium, if you listen real close you can hear Scioscia yell "embarrassment" at the umpires. It is mind-blowing how this display of incompetency came to pass.

All I can say is thank goodness the Angels ended up winning and didn't need to go through with the protest to the league. I say that both for the sake of MLB's integrity but also having to replay the Angels getting swept by the Astros twice would've probably killed me.

Alas, they didn't thanks to Mark Trumbo hitting an accidental game-tying double. The season maintains its almost undetectable pulse for another few days.

Angels 6, Astros 5