Another week, another batch of real tweets from real Angel players that will make you realize baseball players aren't always great mentors, or just make you hungry.
The Angels brought in LaTroy Hawkins to help mentor Jordan Walden. Here is how the mentoring is going so far:
I love Twitter, Hawk, but shouldn't we maybe be focusing on... I don't know, Walden working on his off-speed pitches rather than his tweeting skills? And people wonder why the Halos just signed Jason Isringhausen.
If Hawkins wants to mentor someone, maybe he should focus on Michael Kohn as he seems to have too much spare time on his hands:
Is it bad that im watching Tin Cup for the second time today. #reRuns— Michael Kohn (@MichaelKohn58) February 22, 2012
Way to put in the work, Kohn. Clearly the best thing to do when fighting for a big league job is to watch movies on TV all day instead of working out. I hear Salt Lake City is beautiful in April.
I'm not into all of C.J. Wilson's "Positive Mental Attitude" tweets, but I finally found one that I can believe in:
Say NO to drugs, Say YES to tacos.#pma— C.J. Wilson (@str8edgeracer) February 20, 2012
Mmmm... tacos. Seriously, I need some good tacos. Turns out it isn't so easy to find quality Mexican food in Washington state. Someone needs to hook a brother up.
I tried warning you earlier this week, yet nobody listened to me, including Mark Trumbo:
I would be embarrassed if my name was associated with Ghost Rider 2. What an epic fail of a movie. #worstever— Mark Trumbo (@Mtrumbo44) February 22, 2012
See! What did I tell you people?!?! Ghost Rider blows. Now, when some dumbass studio executive green lights a third Ghost Rider film, you have no one to blame but yourself if you flush $10 down the drain to go and see it.
And finally, Chevy Clarke takes a break from his regular stream of disjointed, non-sensical sayings to obsess about donuts:
Krispy Kreme doughnuts when the hot light is on >>>>>— Chevy (@OfficialChevy) February 23, 2012
There might not be anyone on earth who loves Krispy Kreme more than me, but Chevy went nuts about them. Seriously, go back to his timeline and find that tweet. He proceeded then proceeded to tweet about nothing buy Krispy Kreme for the next seven hours. For a little while there I thought that he might be getting paid to promote them, but then I realized that nobody would pay an anonymous minor leaguer who is about to wash out of Rookie ball to promote anything. Then I realized he probably just realized that he might need a job if he doesn't show progress on the field this season, so he is actually trying to get in the company's good graces.
Clever, Chevy. Clever like a fox.
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Garrett, I too am a transplanted So Cal kid. Unfortunately, you will not find truly good Mexican food until you head back to Halo land. Try La Cabana on Beacon Hill. No So Cal, but not bad.
Chevy should never NEED a job, did you see the size of the signing bonus he got? As long as he doesn't blow it on jewelry and other useless garbage he should be set for life. I really wish that coming out of high school I was about 4 inches taller and of different ethnicity. Grad school would've been a bit easier to pay for.
What's the average American make over a life time, around 1 mil? Clarke's bonus was almost 1.1 mil. If he washes out of Rookie Ball I'd suggest he get a degree and invest a little in Real Estate.
Kohn should, at the very least, be watching a Kevin Costner movie about baseball. Even a Rene Russo movie about baseball. Twice.
And Mark! What were you thinking? Ghost Rider 2? For your penance, you need to go to the movies tonight and see Act Of Valor. Nothing cheers me up more than seeing dead POS terrorists.
@Rick K. Great point! I didn't think of that with Kohn. How is he not watching any of the Costner baseball movies instead?
As for Trumbo, karma already punished him for his choice today with the grounder he took off his face. That'll teach him!